My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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