Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
