i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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