Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
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