Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
