I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
