haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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