What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
