Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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