i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
