New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Randomize
