Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
