Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Enjoy the penises
Randomize
