p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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