You don't have asthma, your pregnant
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
