Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Randomize
