everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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