so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Randomize
