Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize
