If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
