Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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