Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Four minutes until I can fart!
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize