I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Randomize
