A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
