I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
