Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
