I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
you inspire me to be a worse person
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
