So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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