Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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