He felt like a one man threesome
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
