But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
