I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
this beer tastes like vomit already
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
