i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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