I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
