So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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