Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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