So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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