Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
