So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize