with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Randomize
