new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Randomize
