He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I love having hate sex.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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