i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
