I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
