: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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