I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
