I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
You know, be my cock's hype man.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
