He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
