You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
