I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
